love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
