This dress was meant to end up on your floor
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize
