That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
She needs sedatives and a leash
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
