I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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