he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize