Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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