I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
