Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
