How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
