there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
