singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
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