ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I have already put on my inside pants.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
