I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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