Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
God I need to hump something, right now.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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