Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize