Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
