No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Randomize
