Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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