what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
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