Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I still have a little drunk in my system
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Randomize
