fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
The air was thick with penises
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
