if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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