Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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