My brain says no but my pants say off.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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