I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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