She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
