You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
