based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
