you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Randomize
