My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
