the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
