I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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