can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
