Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
