cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
