I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
