You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
