I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
