I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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