He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Randomize
