he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Randomize
