After last night, I could never be a politician.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
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