Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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