Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
