Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
We are all done wearing pants today
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