how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
