I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
