so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
