I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
i think i just naturally attract stoners
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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