Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
